You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
