I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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