I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
