i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
