I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
