Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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