I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Shitshow foam night was such a success
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
