the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
