You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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