I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
