I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
