Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
