butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I didn't shave. On purpose
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize