is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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