good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We have started to decorate penises.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize