even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
