no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I have post one night stand depression
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize