the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
