Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
