it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
