i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
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