Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason

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  (847): This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason http://tfl.nu/ngth
  Replies (24) Good night (712) Bad night (859) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.

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  (978): I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it. http://tfl.nu/p2ch
  Replies (4) Good night (2596) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  "Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.

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  (913): "Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/szr3
  Replies (61) Good night (866) Bad night (10811) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.

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  (301): I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this. http://tfl.nu/hhg4
  Replies (12) Good night (1186) Bad night (2507) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay

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  (510): Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay http://tfl.nu/s2rn
  Replies (65) Good night (20556) Bad night (1834) Order T-Shirt
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  "people in the room" being me.

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  (336): the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine. (336): "people in the room" being me. http://tfl.nu/hpsj
  Replies (12) Good night (5434) Bad night (1125)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart

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  (502): We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart http://tfl.nu/qvlm
  Replies (6) Good night (1890) Bad night (671) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?

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  (715): Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet? http://tfl.nu/ptcd
  Replies (14) Good night (3046) Bad night (884) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories

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  (706): Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories http://tfl.nu/hpss
  Replies (5) Good night (1867) Bad night (635) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair

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  (570): I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair http://tfl.nu/vjbt
  Replies (3) Good night (733) Bad night (1197) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.

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  (256): She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks. http://tfl.nu/9wib
  Replies (5) Good night (1972) Bad night (435) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with

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  (860): Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with http://tfl.nu/09mm
  Replies (5) Good night (1105) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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  (718): View more from New York

  Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.

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  (718): Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really. http://tfl.nu/n2d1
  Replies (13) Good night (2518) Bad night (485) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?

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  (802): Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter? http://tfl.nu/jufp
  Replies (7) Good night (931) Bad night (231) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.

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  (931): Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close. http://tfl.nu/0xt0
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (517) Order T-Shirt

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