Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
