I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
