it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
