What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
