This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
