She said her name was "party"
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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