I wanna passion pit in your ass
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
