My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
as a side note pls kill me
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
