It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
My life is pants optional.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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