he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize