Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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