how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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