You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Randomize
