We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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