dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
