and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
