You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
