Jerry, you need to find god
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Randomize
