Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo. http://tfl.nu/92km
  Replies (2) Good night (982) Bad night (423) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less http://tfl.nu/o2ix
  Replies (25) Good night (447) Bad night (874)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them http://tfl.nu/iz6h
  Replies (16) Good night (482) Bad night (3576) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome! http://tfl.nu/2tqo
  Replies (79) Good night (17771) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover http://tfl.nu/6ccc
  Replies (46) Good night (5279) Bad night (603) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room. http://tfl.nu/h78r
  Replies (13) Good night (755) Bad night (5533) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey. http://tfl.nu/4gnd
  Replies (13) Good night (4290) Bad night (958) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along. http://tfl.nu/2jm5
  Replies (32) Good night (1476) Bad night (5097) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time. http://tfl.nu/mdb9
  Replies (105) Good night (1285) Bad night (6264) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night? http://tfl.nu/owky
  Replies (3) Good night (3666) Bad night (754) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop. http://tfl.nu/iw16
  Replies (20) Good night (3576) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.

  (410): View more from Maryland

  The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good. (410): The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky. http://tfl.nu/y3f5
  Replies (10) Good night (818) Bad night (1890)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday! http://tfl.nu/4hno
  Replies (5) Good night (879) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals. http://tfl.nu/uk0n
  Replies (4) Good night (391) Bad night (1193) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?

  (1-810): View more from Michigan

  A safari of penis I hurt to the core

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas? (1-810): A safari of penis I hurt to the core http://tfl.nu/q0bf
  Replies (5) Good night (730) Bad night (349) Order T-Shirt

Randomize