Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
