I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
