3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
