you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
