shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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