why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
