There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
