no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
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All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
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She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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