question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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