Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I think my moral compass just broke
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize