I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize
